Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Sorry

Ellen has talked about this before--it's one of her pet peeves--but I myself hadn't run into that much until recently.

In a nutshell, you tell someone that your child has cerebral palsy and then they make a frowny-face and say, "I'm so sorry." It's weird. It seems like it would be a good thing to say, but you feel like you need to argue with them--point out that your child is happy and loved. The person feels sorry for you and you want to take their pity and maybe jam it down their throats a little bit. Maybe. You surely don't want their pity. You want them to see your child's abilities, what they can do in spite of adversity. You definitely don't want them to feel sorry for you.


And so for those that do feel sorry for me, I ask you to do this instead:


Be sorry that some people's lives are so narrow that they are unable to see past appearances.


Be sorry that so much ignorance about disability still exists.


Be sorry that some people won't ever get to know the joy of my child's smile because they are too busy looking away.


Be sorry about that.